afterGRADlife
as i heard their final words about how well i did with my orals, i couldn't help but be torn between my mixed emotion of discouragement and happiness. before i elaborate and tell a dramatic notion about the 'discouragement' part, i'm thankful to inform you that i passed the final requirement of my course and i'm pretty much sure that i can call myself a graduate. honor, glory, and praises will always find their way to escape from my mouth and reach the Lord's Throne; for i wouldn't have done it without Him.
alright, briefly i will discuss the not-so-good part of my passing the orals...just wanna get it out of my system. "..you need to hone your skills more as a future therapist..." i'm just so grateful to tell you guys (defense mechanism aside) that now, i consider it as a challenge and not to belittle my capabilities of becoming an effective occupational therapist (and hopefully a competitive one) someday. they thought i am going to pursue my studies to medicine because they figured that i was more knowledgeable in the medical/surgical part of the clinical case. uh-oh...thanks but, no thanks. studying this 5-year course has been an exciting roller coaster ride for me already and i don't wanna end up purging out all my dreams of working in a hospital & dealing with patients, should i be continuing to study medicine.
my doctor panelist (a psychiatrist) commented on my state of emotion during the final orals - AMBIVALENCE (having positive & negative emotion both at the same time). that made me laugh a bit. thanks, doc. but that didn't help the battle of sentiments that was starting to build up inside as they declared "You passed" right in front of my face.
as i immediately rushed towards where my parents are prayerfully waiting for me (yep, full family support ito), i was trying to brush off the negative vibe coz it would ruin the whole celebration. i tapped my parents' shoulders and they anxiously looked at my face for a reaction. as i made a thumbs up sign, big smiles and discreet cheer has registered into their faces. it was a big relief and I was overjoyed, now that i have made them finally proud of me after everything that has happened. all glory to God!
i think during the afternoon of the next day when the ecstatic feeling of my parents had started to subside. they kept on naming me "the graduate" (was that a Dennis Hoffman flick?). i guess you can never take that emotional high from the ones who brought you up to become a better person & have seen your ups and downs.
there are so many people who are responsible of receiving my thank you's, sobrang dami talaga. i got a huge dose of encouragement, prayer and support from my youth pastor & his wife, 3 nights before i had my final stint at UST. we had an awesome fellowship at our humble habitat, which helped me to drive away all my fears and anticipation. i was able to share with them my future plans, as well as my plans that have been given a "stop sign" from the Lord. i'd still wait upon Him if it's gonna be a stop sign forever, or if i would continue to seek before obeying God. It was definitely a night full of God's wonderful presence and perspectives that are in line to His will. may the Lord richly bless kuya mike & ate ca.
my friends @ church, who never failed praying for me and when i finally broke the news to them, it's so great to see their expression of gladness!
my berks @ UST, guys...thanks for all the academic and emotional support. i deeply appreciate it. I know you're gonna help me to cope with the board exam stress this coming February.
I still have plenty of time before our review (on oct. 24), and for that I would want to be consumed by the Lord in doing His work and maximizing more of my time with Him alone.
Basta, my life is safe in His arms. I fully depend on my Lord. I'm gonna be alright.
